A Week of Radical Self-love

This week has been an incredible journey of self-love. I started it off by sharing the first part of my story regarding the relationship with my mom. It was hard to hit "publish," but I felt deeply guided to share it now. I know so many people relate to these struggles, and my goal has always been to share what I learn to help others find their own success and peace.

Sharing that story felt like a final release—a confirmation that I have truly healed the chaos. Seeing my mom’s birthday everywhere lately doesn't feel like a trigger anymore; it feels like a safe, gentle nudge to keep going. I’m so grateful for the support and the visitors to my site. If my story sparks questions for you, please reach out through my website. I’d love to answer them in future posts (anonymously, of course) to help us all grow together.

The Vision: Blue, Black, and Bold

After posting Part 1, I finally treated myself to a hair transformation I’ve been envisioning: blue in the front and black in the back. I was in the stylist's chair from 11 AM to 5 PM—a long day for both of us! Between bleaching the roots and neutralizing some leftover green to get the perfect custom shade of blue, it was a process.

I wasn’t sure if the finances would align for this, as it’s a big investment and I have a lot of hair! But I told the universe, "I don't care, this is happening," and I made it work. I am so happy with the results. It was such a gift to let someone else take care of me instead of doing it myself.

Rest as a Resource

This week, I worked just enough to get by because my body was demanding rest. I’ve realized that I accomplish so much more when I allow myself to start fresh rather than pushing through burnout.

That said, I did get back into my marathon training! I hit the gym four times this week and started adding running back into the mix after my bout with shin splints. It feels good to move, but it feels even better to know when to stop.

Empowerment Behind the Lens

On Thursday, I had my second boudoir session. My first was in 2023, and since then, my body has changed. I’m heavier now than I was then, but strangely, I felt even more confident, empowered, and beautiful this time around.

I let the stylists surprise me with the makeup and curls, and I felt absolutely amazing. This experience is all about body positivity—it’s a gift I give to myself to see my own confidence and smile captured on film. I woke up that morning feeling exhausted, but as soon as the transformation started, I livened up. I even honored my body with a 30-minute nap afterward, which was exactly what I needed to finish the day strong.

Creativity and Pivoting

In the crochet studio, I’ve had to practice some patience. I was struggling with a specific project last weekend and finally decided to scrap the original plan and look for a different pattern—something that makes the vision easier to execute. I’m still working through the prototype, and while I’m not 100% sure yet, I’m sticking with it until I have my answer. Stay tuned—I can’t wait to share this one with you when it’s ready for the shop!

The Grace in Starting Over

As I wrap up this week, I’ve had to lean heavily into patience and compassion for myself. On Friday, I spent hours crocheting, only to end up "frogging" (ripping out) almost everything I had done. It was frustrating, and by Saturday, I realized I simply needed to call it quits for the day.

I haven't touched my hook or my yarn since. I needed a break to gain some clarity. Sometimes, the best way to move forward is to step away entirely so you can look at the project—and yourself—with fresh eyes.

Between the crochet pivots and the marathon training not looking exactly how I envisioned it, this week taught me that "success" isn't always a straight line. It’s okay to rest. It’s okay to be tired. It’s okay to not have the answer yet. I am choosing to trust that the clarity will come when I am well-rested and ready.

A Note to You

If you’ve been reading along, I want you to know that this level of peace and self-love is possible for you, too. It comes with tears and anger sometimes, but you can get through to the other side. When you start to love yourself, everything changes.

If you would like to see more about how I’m applying this patience and compassion, head over to my Marathon Training page to follow along with that part of my journey.

I love you.

This is Love

P.S. I had this post ready to go on Friday, but I wanted to wait until the week ended to see if there was anything else to add. Sunday night rolled around, and I still hadn't posted it. I think there was a reason I was holding onto this piece.

Last night, I had a major breakthrough with my crochet project! After weeks of crocheting, frogging, and searching YouTube for inspiration, I finally found what I was looking for. It turned out to be something so simple—the thought just popped into my head, and it wasn't even from a video. Even though it felt like I spent so much time struggling, I stuck with it and didn't give up. I prayed for an answer, and I got it when I least expected it. I kept going because I know this project is special. I can’t wait to finish it and share it with all of you. Stay tuned!